TOP TEN LAMEST EXCUSES TO MISS CHURCH THIS SUNDAY:

10.  "MY CHURCH RECENTLY INITIATED A "NON-SMOKING" POLICY...""

 9.  "IF 10% IS GOOD ENOUGH FOR TITHING, ATTENDING 10% OF THE TIME SHOULD BE, AS WELL..."

 8.  "NONE OF MY DRESS CLOTHES MATCH THE CHURCH PEWS..."

 7.  "I CAN'T HEAR MY IPOD WHEN THE CHOIR IS SINGING..."

 6.  "WAITING FOR CHURCH RECLINERS TO ARRIVE..."

 5.  "THE CHURCH MASSEUSE IS ALREADY BOOKED FOR THAT SERVICE..."

 4.  "WHY GO TO CHURCH WHEN I CAN WATCH "OPRAH" INSTEAD?..."

 3.  "I HAVE BRAND-NEW BED LINENS I'M TRYING TO BREAK-IN..."

 2.  "NO BREAKFAST BUFFET IN SANCTUARY..."

AND THE NUMBER ONE LAMEST EXCUSE TO MISS CHURCH THIS SUNDAY:

 1. ANY EXCUSE NOT MENTIONED IN THE PREVIOUS NINE...

Remember folks, they can't all be gems...
Dale Golden
www.daleandcherylgolden.com

Copyright Dale Golden 2008.  May be used with permission and large amounts of free hair-growth formula.